One Less Caramel Macchiato.

Sometimes, we just need change. We get stuck in routine and become bored with our humdrum lives. When we find ourselves in a rut, we yearn for something more, something different, something new and exciting. We daydream about a stranger coming to take us away or of being fired so that we have a second chance to chase our dreams. We search for new recipes, hair colors, clothes, coffee flavors, dishes at our favorite restaurants, bands, songs, books and words. We look for new opportunities and big breaks. We stop appreciating what is around us and start looking everywhere else but here. Because eventually, something has got to give.

Then it gives.

It gives a lot.

From big, life-altering events to insignificant daily tweaks, things start changing.

New people come into your friend groups and relationships start changing. New job opportunities arise, and your daydream of living in a different city has the chance to become a reality. New classes are offered at your school, and your quest for new words, thoughts, and ideas might come to a temporary end. New songs start playing on the radio, and your view of certain artists start to shift. New coffee flavors are offered at your daily coffee shop, and your barista insists that you will have to change your regular order.

At first, the excitement is too much to contain because this is all you've ever wanted! But then . . . your mind starts racing.

Wait. Hold on. This isn't what I signed up for. It was just a silly day dream. I was having a bad day, so I told my friend I needed a change. I didn't expect for anything to actually come of this. This is too much. I don't think I can do this. Who needs caramel-hazelnut-mocha surprise anyway? Wasn't caramel macchiato enough? I liked my life before; it was a good one. My friends were just annoying me because we spent too much time together, I didn't actually want anyone new to show up. Why do they all look so happy for me? Don't they see that this is just too, too, too, too, TOO much?!?!!!

Fear.

That is called fear.

Our minds instantaneously go from new and lovely to scary and overwhelmed. What we wanted and hoped for now seems ridiculously frivolous and impossible. We start yearning for the simpler days of routine and humdrum. We do not like change, no matter how much we want and need it.

When this change comes we have two options. We can retreat into ourselves and our familiar lives of friends who only make life as complicated as what is already "normal" and our old jobs that give us little to no fulfillment or joy and our regular coffee orders that don't really taste like anything anymore.

Or.

We can embrace the change. We can look forward with our heads up and hearts open. Taking the new challenge one step at a time. Looking beside us to see which of those familiar friends are still walking beside us, supporting our new lives. Finding joy in the challenges a new job or class might bring. Surprising our taste buds with the mixture of caramel-hazelnut-mocha.

That second option. It sounds beautiful, doesn't it?

There is a reason for that.

Change does not come from nowhere. Change comes from somewhere. In my opinion and firm belief, change comes from the only Somewhere that really matters. A Somewhere that is so beyond us its mystery is overwhelming. That Mystery is exactly what we find in our changing, shifting, chaotic life. The Unknown is the real thing that never changes. The Mysterious Unknown is bigger than us, deeper than us, and more meaningful than us. Yet, it is exactly where we find meaning, depth, and learn to appreciate the grandeur of our chaotic lives.

I write this in a time of change. For the past two and a half years my life has not stopped changing - and the past three months have not followed a different pattern. For the past two and half years my friends and family members have grown and their lives have changed. We have all been in this together, with the One who created new things, gives opportunities, and faithfully holds us in the midst of chaos.

For this Mysterious Faithful Creating Loving Peace-granting Table-turning Ground-shifting Unknown One, I am thankful. And in this One, I take refuge.

Will you join me in the journey of embracing change and leaving fear behind? I would love to see your face beside me as I look around, step-by-step. If you say yes, the promise of faithfulness is there. So, what'll it be?

"Hear my cry, O God;
listen to my prayer.
From the end of the earth I call to you,
when my heart is faint.

Lead me to the rock
that is higher than I;

for you are my refuge,
 a strong tower against the enemy.

Let me abide in your tent forever,
find refuge under the shelter of your wings.

For you, O God, have heard my vows;
you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.

Prolong the life of the king;
may his years endure to all generations!
May he be enthroned forever before God;
appoint steadfast love and faithfulness to watch over him!

So I will always sing praises to your name,
as I pay my vows day after day." -Psalm 61 (NRSV)